Just Like Us

 

 

 

 

 

It has become evident that The Viking and I have rubbed off on our cats.  You might think that would be a good thing, especially if we are competent at using a litter box, but it’s probably not.  It appears they are picking up only our bad habits and personality disorders.

When Mim brought her two kitties (Dexter & Lucy) for a visit all 4 cats got bent out of shape.  Despite having spent quite a bit of time together (and playing!) in the past 6 months they act like they’ve never laid eyes on each other before.  Every human got at least 2 Stink Eyes from at least 2 cats.

 

 

 

 

 

And then………Everycat started Kung Fu Fighting.

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Lucy was the most committed.  She takes her Kung Fu very seriously.  Izzie was a close second because she, too, enjoys the occasional Kung Fu Free-For-All.  Blizzards of slapping happened with staccatos of trash talk.  They are both lovely ladies but I’m pretty sure there were a few ‘fucks’ thrown around and perhaps a little body shaming in between the lightning-fast bitch slaps.

In the meantime, Dexter and Teddy thought they should be doing something.  Dex made the first move – a half-assed slap aimed slightly to the left of Teddy.  Teddy sent a quick poke that fell far short of Dex and that was that.  Dex sort of went “Aw…fuck it!” and took over the top of the spare fridge.  Lucy finally decided that she’d had enough of the opening skirmish and took over the top tier of the Cat Tree.

We humans started nodding our heads going “that went well”, genuinely pleased with the social skills of our Clowder.  Mim and Brad had to leave for a few hours so The Viking and I were the referees should anymore conversations break out.

Eventually, the house settled into quiet.  So quiet, in fact, that I became a little suspicious and went to check on the combatants.  Teddy was humped up taking a poo in Dex and Lucy’s litter box while Izzie was rolling all over their blankets.

“Our cats are now Passive Aggressive!”  I said to The Viking.  “That’s exactly how we would handle an unwanted invasion into our territory.  You would poo in their suitcase and I would spray something smelly on their bed.”

“Why would I be the one to poo in the suitcase?”

“Because that’s definitely a guy thing to do.  Besides, you’re a better pooper than I am.”

Mim and Brad came again this past weekend and our suspicions were confirmed.  Once again, Dexter took over the top of the spare fridge and Lucy commandeered the top tier of the Cat Tree.  Izzie – she’s the brains – and Teddy wandered down the hallway, probably intending to poo and roll again but something else presented itself.

The Viking and I were watching a movie when we heard a loud rustling of plastic.  I went to investigate.  Both cats had ripped open Dexter and Lucy’s treat bag and were busy munching.  When they saw me coming both cats started to eat faster and faster.  By the time I rescued the bag there were only 3 treats left.

How can I be mad when they are doing exactly what we would do?  The Viking and I would totally eat their treats.  And make yum-yum noises as we did it.

I’m fairly certain that Teddy pooped in their litter box at some point and Izzie rolled all over their blankets again but I didn’t actually witness the crime.  Izzie did camp out on the floor in front of the Cat Tree – an “I dare you to come down, Lucy” sort of thing while Teddy took up a position in front of the fridge.  He was less effective because he is on pretty good terms with Dexter.  You have to give him points for his solidarity to his sister though.

So, now I’m wondering if The Viking and I need to be setting a better example.  When someone comes to the front door I have to admit that I’m a little standoffish but I’ve honestly never got into a bitch-slapping fight.  Okay….there was that one time I almost did but I managed to use my words to drive the person off the step.  And to be fair, they were trying to sell me a vacuum cleaner and dumped dirt all over the front door mat.

I suppose I could be more welcoming.  I could offer refreshments and stale cookies.  Would that make the cats better about welcoming their cousins?  It’s doubtful.  The damage is already done, precedence has been set, a routine established.  A change in tradition might cause more harm than good because cats get crazy about changes to the rules.

It’s settled then.  I don’t have to be any nice-r to people bothering me at the front door and The Viking can still poo in suitcases if he doesn’t like the company.

6 thoughts on “Just Like Us”

  1. I.love.you… And the Viking, and Izzy and Teddy.

    I am not sure about visiting in person, don’t wonder why I keep my purse by my feet at all times, if I ever do travel to meet you two! But, as usual, your story left me teary eyed and with what I call echo-giggles… (when you giggle long after there’s nothing funny to laugh about anymore)

    Great post, as always!!

    Have a fabulous Wednesday 🙂

    P.S. I’ve linked you in my “Nombril de semaine” post…
    https://cyranny.wordpress.com/2017/06/07/nombril-de-semaine-10/

    1. Thanks for putting me on the list, sistah! I also realized that I’m not actually following you via email and I fixed that in a big hurry! I love you, too. Someday we shall meet and it shall be epic. :o)

      1. Oh I think the word epic will pale after that day! LOL

        Btw ask the Viking if he has any other quest for me… Because, yes, I am going back to Denmark in September!!!! (I just have a week, because the only condition chéri has put on the table, was that he wanted to make a 50/50 trip Sweden/Denmark… What the heck, I’m going back to Vikingland!!! Yay!)

        1. The Viking’s brother and his beautiful girlfriend are coming for a 3 week visit in the middle of July. He’s bringing licorice (of course) and Remoulade and other yummy treasures for us.

          And just send us a picture of you doing something Viking. We would love that! :o) I hope you have a wonderful trip.

  2. Thank you so much for the laugh. What a great post! I always look forward to your stories, but the kitty posts are my favorites. You’re lucky, it could be worse. My husband and I lived in different states, before we were married. During my first visit, his cat peed on my French Luggage. I saved for a long time to buy that suitcase. Luckily, I also bought the plastic cover. So not too much damage was done. I guess his kitty thought I was a feline interloper. Poor thing.

    1. I had two cats when I first moved in with The Viking. Until she met The Viking, my Maggie hated every man she met. The other cat was a nightmare that we just couldn’t keep but she peed on his wet suit. Luckily, it was a WET suit and it washed right out. We had to put Maggie to sleep 4 years ago due to kidney disease. :o( But our Izzie and Teddy has filled the empty places.

      Thanks for commenting Robin. :o)

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